Unexpected Beauty

Life is predicable at times and full of wonder too.  It’s the unexpected privations that normally hit us the hardest. As long as we’re alive, there will always be pleasant surprises and unforeseen hardships that are simply a part of life.

 

Pleasant surprises are when you run into a friend you haven’t seen in a long time. finding $20 in a pair of pants you haven’t worn in a few weeks, buying a $1 scratch ticket and revealing that you just won $100, hitting a drive on a par 3 and seeing it roll into the cup for a hole-in-one, receiving a bonus at work that you had no idea was coming your way.  These are easy to live with.  In fact, we all wish pleasant surprises came our way ever day!

Unexpected hardships are tougher to deal with, however.  Getting word that your grandpa just passed away when you had spoken to him the previous evening, receiving a note from the company you work for that they are closing shop and laying off all the workers in two weeks, discovering that your child has a grave illness.  These unexpected moments are tough to take; they take an emotional toll on your mind, your heart, and your soul.

Pleasant surprises are something that we love to share with others.  It fun to let those close to us know about our recent fortune.  It’s harder, however, to talk to someone about tragedies that befall us.

Have you ever stopped to think that things may happen for a reason?  Good things that come our way can be perceived as something that we may be entitled to, or we’ve earned them because we’re good people – we stop to help an elderly person cross the street, we chase down someone that left their phone on top of the gas pump, we stop to help a family change a flat tire.  Why wouldn’t we feel entitled to some rewards that come our way, right?

But what about those times when hardships hit us when we least expect it.  We tend to fold inwardly, isolating ourselves from others – afraid that they may see our suffering and judge us somehow.  That’s where unexpected beauty steps in.  It’s those moments when you realize that you have someone to fall back on and help you through the challenges and difficulties of the unexpected adversity, when someone that you least expect is willing to talk you through it all with compassion and grace, when a person outside your immediate circle holds your hand and loves you unconditionally, where you’re allowed to shed tears, scream at the world and know that your emotions are safe with them.  That is unexpected beauty – a gift when you least expect or feel unworthy of it.

All of us from time-to-time will feel as if our whole world is crashing down around us.  When that happens be open to the unexpected beauty that will always be there when you need it the most.

A Common Man 

God's Children

Watching you grow in life is a blessing and a longing at the same time.  The blessings come from watching each of you become responsible adults, making smart choices, and contributing to the greater good of this world.  The longing is when we’re separated by miles, long car rides and airplane flights, not being able to pull you in close and reassure you that everything is going to be ok when the world comes crashing in around you.

Over the years, I’ve seen you handle sorrow with grace and pain with dignity.  I’ve watched from afar as you’ve tackled tough decisions and made the best of your circumstances. Each of you have expressed yourself from different platforms and pulpits, but always with a heart of fairness and equality.

To Scooterbutt, you have been a beacon of light in so many storms.  Wearing your heart on your sleeve, you always find positives in the dark and rays of sunshine amongst the clouds.  Your strength amazing me, but your determination to find the good amongst the evil sets you apart.  You are the rock of the family foundation.

To Jaybird, you are driven like no other.  You set your mind to do something, then let absolutely nothing get in the way of your goals.  You take life as it is; putting no behavioral expectations on anyone other than yourself.  You are loyal to a fault, and care for your own family with a warrior-like mentality.

To Gus, you embrace change.  You have always lived life on your own terms, but always with a respect for those around you.  You refuse to allow anyone to define you, yet you listen to other’s opinions and adapt to better yourself where it feels right to do so.  You are innocently unaware of your talents, but they are there and you will discover them during the right moments in your life.

To Mater, you are as independent as the day is long.  Even though you shy away from showing it, you have a heart of gold and a capacity to love far beyond measure.  You have a fiery passion that burns inside of you, seeking justice and truth for man and animal alike.  You are only now beginning to discover all the gifts you have, and your appetite for life will take you far.    

No one ever said life was going to be fair.  The amazing thing is that no matter what each of you have had to deal with, you’ve never faltered in your belief that you couldn’t overcome it, learn from it, and continue to grow despite it.

I don’t really feel that I have a right to call you MY children, because in fact you’ve always been God’s creation lent to me to raise.  What a gift each of you are to me.  To say I’m proud to be a part of your life is an understatement of great proportions.  Each of you are on you own now, but trust me when I tell you that you are just beginning to fly.  Soon enough you will soar in your own patterns and paths, hopefully crossing each other along the way.

A Common Dad

Courage is...

Opening your heart.

Accepting others just as they are.

Having faith in things you have no control over.

Looking beyond assumptions.

Sharing your fears.

Embracing your identity.

Giving in to someone else.

Listening without judging.

Admitting change is necessary.

Loving unconditionally.

Trusting in a higher power.

A Common Man

Amazing Grace

With all the rhetoric of late across this great nation of ours, I’m amazed at how we’ve transformed ourselves from a voice of grace and dignity to a tone of disrespect and insult.

Grace is defined in numerous ways:

“Simple elegance or refinement of movement”

“The free and unmerited favor of God”

“Disposition to or an act or instance of kindness”

What troubles me is that lately I haven’t seen much grace in alignment with these definitions.  What I see instead is just the opposite.

Antonyms of Grace include:

“Interference”

“Crudeness”

“Flaw”

Recent Facebook posts, tweets, and conversation go something like this:

“Our political system is defective.”

“There are too many obstacles to overcome because of the failure of others.”

“She’s inferior and ignorant.  She doesn’t belong there!”

What if we were to embrace the way we communicate to and about others with grace and dignity vice put-downs and insults?  What if our conversations across social media and face-to-face reflected something similar to the following:

“I may not agree with his stance, but I respect that he’s entitled to his opinion on the matter.”

“I appreciate that despite her struggle to answer the question, she did her best to remain composed during the heated debate.”

“Sure, we have problems, but collectively we have enough compassion for one another to overcome anything!”

Wouldn’t the world be a better place if we took a more graceful approach to our discussions?  Think about the possibilities if as one nation, one world, we chose to embrace differences as opposed to ridiculing what we don’t agree with.

Let’s give grace a try, shall we?

A Common Man